Starting Preschool

If anyone knows little C, they would agree that he is “spirited”.  Don’t get me wrong, he is an absolute sweetheart, but he wants what he wants when he wants it, and nothing will stand in his way of getting it.  I know this is a trait that will only benefit him as an adult, but as a 4 year old, its rough on the parenting front.  I really wanted to skip preschool, I loved being home with him and felt that going to play dates was enough interaction for him with other children to help socialize him.  However, since I needed to go back to work due to financial issues, I decided to put him in preschool two days a week.

Little C doing "Creative Play"

The first day was a little rough, he did in fact cry for me when I was leaving.  I didn’t know if it was best if I slip out the door, hug him goodbye and leave with him crying, it was so difficult.  His teacher told me I should just kiss him goodbye, let him know I’ll be back in a few hours and leave.  Gosh was it tough, I could hear him crying down the hall.  I was so worried all day.  How is he doing?  Is he still crying?  Will he bully the other kids?  Will he yell at the teacher the same way he yells at me?  When it was time to pick him up, just 4 hours after dropping him off I peeked into the classroom.  He was playing with one of his classmates at the table.  When I walked in he shrieked MOMMY ran over, gave me a hug and then told me “just a minute”.  When I told him it was time to go, he started crying again, this time he wanted to STAY!  He got his taste of what preschool was all about and loved it!

I can honestly say I have seen a huge difference in little C since starting preschool.  He plays better with other children, he no longer bullies his cousin and actually shares.  He potty trained which was a huge power struggle and his speech is getting better.  There has been no tears since that first day of preschool, just praise and happiness.  According to his teacher he is “Mr. Personality” and is the welcome wagon to every child  that arrives.  When we leave he waves goodbye and tells every child by name, “see you  tomorrow Parker”.  He loves his teacher and asks for her by name.

Preschool has been a blessing to us.  I’m certainly in no rush to put him in 5 days a week, but if I did, I’m sure he would have no complaints!

It's OKAY to wait on potty training!

A while ago I wrote about potty training my very head strong stubborn toddler.  Of course technically thats not even a correct statement, he’s not a toddler he’s a preschooler.  I had been trying to train him since about 2.5.  I pretty much tried everything in the book to get that child to potty train.  It just wasn’t happening.  Finally I was at a playdate and the Librarian was there and she heard me talking about my disastrous potty training attempts.  She continued to tell me that Rocky was over 4 years old before he was potty trained and that he is just fine.  For some reason a light went off in my head, it was almost as if she was giving me permission to stop trying and put it in little C’s hands.  So that’s what I did, I laid off and gave up all mentions of underwear, the potty and everything else I was doing.

The comments continued from the older generation.  “Well if he was my son, he would have been on the potty since he was 2”, “Well in my day we just MADE them do it”.  And then there was an event where I worked with an elimination communicationist (They learn their baby’s cues and hold them over toilets, claiming to have their children trained at infancy) and the mere disgust on the faces that I had an almost 4 year old still in diapers was enough to make me want to run screaming.  If you have the patience and can do what they do… more power to you, but that is not for me.  They said I was training my child to be reliant on diapers.  I guess…

The hardest part of having an older child not toilet trained is not the diapers, its the constant disapproval from outsiders.  I’m always amazed at how once you join this motherhood club, the lack of filter some people have.  Just because we’re both moms doesn’t mean you have the right to tell me what I’m doing wrong.  I can see if I’m soliciting advice, but if I’m changing my son’s diaper on a changing table that is obviously too small for him, I don’t need the comment “looks like that boy needs to be going on the toilet, he’s too big for a changing table”.  Keep it to yourself lady, you think I’m choosing this?

So back to my stubborn, head strong preschooler.  My mother-in-law was determined to get Little C toilet trained.  I kept telling her I was waiting for him to be ready but if she thought she could do it… more power to her.  She purchased the Potty Scotty doll and got everything prepared that Dr. Phil had said to do for the 1 day program.  The plan was to do this Sunday.  We were ready.  I had a long week.  Plus I worked all day Saturday (something I don’t normally do) so Little C was missing me.  Instead of flopping on the couch to relax we decided to take Little C out for the night.  We played, ate and had a great time.  In the bathtub that night he looked at me and told me he needed to go potty.  I whisked him out of the bathtub and onto his potty… he went!  Hooting and hollering followed, he was so proud.  He literally has been potty trained since.

I believe he knew his grandma was going to try to train him the very next day and he wanted to be the person responsible for potty training himself.  I also think he was rewarding me for a great night out and letting him do this on his own.  No matter what his reasoning, he did it totally on his own, I really had no hand in it except helping him to the toilet.  He’s so proud of himself.  Now he’s even going standing up, he transitioned from a little potty to a big one in 3 weeks (which some say takes forever!).

I’m so happy I eased up on him and let him go at his own rate.  I wish more moms would allow their children the freedom and not pressure their children to do things too fast.  Big E was ready very early and was super easy to potty train.  That just wasn’t the case with Little C.  But the moral of the story is that kids will eventually be potty trained.  They wont be going into kindergarten in diapers so maybe we shouldn’t push so hard.

Just make sure to tune all the negative comments out…

The Photo Addict

Rambling Thoughts

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What’s up with the few (ahem) gray hairs standing at attention every time I get out of the shower? I am trying to resist putting chemicals in my hair but they are not helping!  This is perhaps the one and only time I’ve ever wished to be a natural blonde.  I mean, it’s got to be less noticeable if you are blonde than if you have dark hair, right?

Why does it take me so long to get anywhere these days? Like the Scriv, I’ve only got one child.

I swear I was never so absent-minded before I had a child. Does this wear off ever?  I always start with the best of intentions, organizing my day and getting everything I’ll need ready. Yet somehow when I get to the place where I’m going to return something, I inevitably neglect to bring that very something. Or I lose the coupon I so carefully printed off the web that morning that was the reason for me visiting that particular store. Twice I’ve forgotten to take my child’s mitt to t-ball practice. And I never seem to have whatever club card I need. I try not to switch purses much for this very reason!

Where did my 4-year-old learn how to charm me into giving him what he wants? He makes things sound so reasonable.  “How about if you just let me spend a little while on the computer and then when you tell me it’s time to get off and do something else, I’ll do it right away AND I’ll eat that fruit.  Does that sound good, Mommy?”  Aha.  Wait, what did I agree to?  I know darn well he’s probably fibbing.

Ugh.  Bedtime.  Another typical battle with a boy who hates to fall asleep.  “No, I will NOT close my eyes because I am NOT sleepy!”  Snore.

Napping at Disneyland

Disneyland - One of the few places my boy still naps

I used to like Star Wars until I was forced to talk about it twenty-five times a day.  “Do you like the part when Anakin Skywalker turns into Darth Vader?  Did you know that Luke and Leia are brother and sister and Darth Vader is their father?  Did you know that, Mommy?  Anakin used to be good but then he turned to the dark side…”  Thanks, Daddy.  Couldn’t you have waited until he was older?  I have to confess I kind of miss the Wiggles.

Okay, I force myself to go to the gym for about an hour at a time and it does feel good to have some energy and stay trim BUT I still don’t love to exercise and there are these super toned women (moms even) taking several classes a day plus gym time that seem to eat it up. Is there something wrong with me or is it them? And forget about the dieting part. There are simply some things I won’t give up unless the doctor says so.

Why does every other kid seem to love veggies but mine? Are these moms lying to me? And how about the moms who say the kid potty-trained herself in 3 days at age 2? Or the ones whose preschoolers take long naps willingly, go to bed on time AND remain in their own bed every night?  Did I miss something? 

Ah well, here’s something to brag about. My son taught himself to write at 3. Ha. No joke. He loves letters/words. TAKE THAT, MAMAS OF VEGGIE EATERS AND GOOD SLEEPERS!  Who cares if he took 4 ½ years to potty train?  He can write his own random thoughts.  Take today’s tidbit.  “I make chairs”.  Brilliant, eh? (I just got back from Canada, can you tell?)

The Librarian